BY TAYLOR WADE
Average people react to what happens in their life. Extraordinary people create the life they want. The same goes for your love life. If you want an extraordinary love life, you have to be pro-active. Here’s some tips to get you started.
1. Goal Setting
Make it a goal to be in a successful and happy relationship. It doesn’t happen by accident. Take it into your own hands to create the perfect relationship. Create the life you want. The act of goal-setting itself is a rewarding exercise because it allows you to visualize the life and relationship you want. Start with the act of visualizing and verbalizing what you want, without trepidation, and watch the ‘law of attraction’ fall into place.
2. Love Yourself
You are worthy of a happy and rewarding relationship. Self-worth and confidence are the building blocks of healthy relationships. You can’t love someone else until you truly love yourself. You can’t deeply connect with someone else until you deeply connect with yourself. This is because in order to fully love someone and connect with that person, you have to learn to share your own life, which includes sharing your beliefs, thoughts, and feelings. How can you share these things if you don’t know yourself?
3. Set Standards
After you realize your self worth and are madly in love with yourself (in a non-narcissistic way), then comes the potential for a relationship worthy of you and your time. Set standards and stick to them. Average people “settle” in a relationship because of low self-worth, false hope, or fear of being alone. You are not average and you will not fall victim to any of these categories. Set standards and stick to them.
4. Know That Love Is Blind
There is a difference between being in love with someone and being compatible with someone. Both elements should be present in a relationship. If you have love without compatibility, it will be a constant struggle. If you have compatibility without love, there will be no passion. Realize the need for both love and compatibility, and don’t settle for one without the other.
5. Work Hard
As you would work hard at anything you want to improve, (ie: a sport, a language) your love life shouldn’t be different. Wake up every day with the mindset of working to improve your love life. Whether you are already in a relationship or seeking a new relationship, this means practicing positive habits that will allow you to find a meaningful relationship. This goes hand and hand with the next step….
6. Continually Learn and Grow
“The person that you will spend the most time with in your life is yourself, so you better try to make yourself as interesting as possible.”
When you are continually learning and developing new skills, passions, and goals, you are sharper, more alert, and happier. The same also applies to your relationship. As a couple, you should be continually learning and growing as two different people and together. Pursue your own, individual passions that make you who you are (aka. the person your partner fell in love with) and make time to share interests and hobbies with your partner. This will only strengthen and deepen your bond. Last but not least, strive to continually learn new things about your significant other. Ask questions and take an interest in areas of their life that you are unfamiliar with.
7. Keep Good Company
“Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are.”
The people with whom you surround yourself have a tremendous impact on the person you will become. Surround yourself with positive and thriving people that continually push you to become a better person. If you are single, you may meet one of these thriving people. If you are already coupled up, these positive people will have a positive impact on your relationship.
8. Don’t Let Rejection Or Heartbreak Get In Your Way
“You learn more from failure than from success; don’t let it stop you. Failure builds character.”
We’ve all heard stories about the many famous authors, actors, and musicians who had failed perpetually until one day they made it. They didn’t let rejection get in the way of their one goal. Don’t let a recent heartbreak stand in your way of finding love, even if that means getting hurt again. Don’t let rejection get in your way either, even if you have been rejected by the last twenty men or women – number twenty-one could be the one.